Segregation, gangsters, dead african dictators and fabulous cops. AngryFrenchGuy’s Quebec 2009
Orwellian moment of the year: “Cultural community leaders” (and members of the Mayor of Montréal Gérald Tremblay’s political party…) Marvin Rotrand, Robert Libman, Tony Sciascia, Kéder Hippolyte and Alan DeSousa call rival candidate Louise Harel a xenophobe because she expressed the wish Montrealers were not divided along ethnic and linguistic lines.
Second best idea by Montréal Mayor Gérald Tremblay (after those bixi bikes): « It is clear that Montreal’s cultural communities want more and more to get involved at the level of municipal politics, and our party Union Montréal understood that need. »
Municipal political party that had the fewest “cultural community” candidates in the 2009 election: Gérald Tremblay’s Union Montréal
Best argument in a Montreal Gazette editorial in favour of ethnic ghettos: «The big municipal parties choose their candidates centrally, which makes it easy to leave little room for anglophones, allophones, and visible minorities of all language groups. »
Number of visible minority columnists at the Gazette: 0
The unintended consequence of the year: The hysterical campaign against the separatist Louise Harel’s bid to become mayor of Montréal helps socialist separatist muslim Richard Bergeron rise from fringe candidate to within 12 point of being elected mayor. The Montreal Gazette’s bosses at CanWest were not happy about that.
Worst new Canadian trend of the year: Segregation.
Most unconvincing attempt to hide the fact you’re just another rich English-speaking white guy of the year: The CDPQ’s new boss, Anglo Micheal Sabia, tries to get an easy confirmation hearing by posing as a poor defenseless immigrant: «As an allophone, I consider that I have deep roots here, in Québec.»
Fake punt of the year: Bob Gainey fires Hab’s coach Guy Carbonneau just as former Caisse de Placement et de Dépôt boss Henri-Paul Rousseau begins explaining how he lost all of Québec’s retirement money.
Anglocentric quote of the year: Eric Amber. « You obviously can’t read English because you are an uneducated bigot. Go fuck yourself. »
Lie of the Year: Tie. « Louise Harel doesn’t speak English » and « French is not threatened in Montréal »
Most solid argument in a Montreal Gazette editorial on the health of French in Montreal: “Ninety per cent of Quebec francophones think French is threatened. It isn’t.”
Dumbest separatist demo of the year: Demo against Anglos performing at L’Aut Saint-Jean
Worst proposed language policy of the year: The Parti québécois’s French-only kindergartens.
Best measure to protect French in Québec: Jean Charest signs a series of deals that lets workers from France and Québec work in each other’s countries.
Worst English by a Québec politician: Louise Harel and Pauline Marois
Best French by a politician from outside Québec or New Brunswick: Ontario premier Dalton McGuinty
Liberal of the year: Tony Acursso
Conservative of the year: Micheal Ignatieff
Independantist of the year: Amir Khadir
Federalist of the year: Nicolas Sarkozy
English Canadian of the year: Richard Colvin
Most unexpected friend of Québec: Gazprom’s Alexander Medvedev hints that he wants to buy an NHL franchise and move it to Québec City.
Pipe dream of the year: An NHL franchise in Québec City.
Imperialist scion of the year: Beer baron and Habs owner Goeff Molson’s made a good impression on the TV show Tout le Monde en Parle, but no one seemed to realise just how much of a truly astonishing TV moment it was. The Molsons have not come out to chat with the rabble many times since their ancestor John purchased the Province of Québec some 200 years ago. That Geoff Molson spoke fluent French, and even reminisced about going to French school is like Cecil J. Rhodes’ great-grandson speaking Xhosa on South African TV and talking about his education in a desegregated Bantu school. Sure the whole thing was carefully scripted by Le Cabinet de Relations Publiques National. It was an important moment of reconciliation nonetheless.
Political prospect of the year: He’s the mayor of a logging town, he’s a former union boss, he represents Québec at OECD meetings about rural development. Few other Québec politicians could have as broad appeal both in the « regions » and in cosmopolitan Montreal like Haiti-born immigrant Michel Adrien. God even gave him a tornado to raise his national profile in 2009!
Most ungrateful polish immigrant: Bernard Adamus in Voir: « Canada is… Bryan Adams and 10 years in jail for Paul Rose. »
Underreported story of the year: Ethnic profiling in Montréal-Nord
Letter to the editor of the year: Julius Grey in le Devoir on Bill 104
Independence referendum of the year: 90% of Catalans vote to separate from Spain in a non-biding referendum.
Most unconvincing promotion of Québec’s independence by a soverigntist party: The Parti Québécois
Best unsolicited interference by a foreign leader in Québec politics: Dead african dictator Omar Bongo casts winning vote for (former) new Action Démocratique du Québec leader Gilles Taillon..
SpaceClown of the Year: Tie. Cirque du Soleil founder and Westmount MP Marc Garneau
Fabulous fashion statement of the year: Cops in pink camouflage.